Adventures in Sprites

The Car: A Tale of High Adventure and True Romance
by Douglas Olson

Hi, my name is Douglas Olson. The following tale is the first installment of the ongoing story about my '69 Sprite, and the adventures I've had renovating it.

March 6,1997 - While looking through the paper today, I noticed an ad for an Austin Healey Sprite. It's cheap. It's old. I love to fix things. I called the number and left a message.

March 8, 1997 - I have talked with the owner of the vehicle. He has given me directions to come out and see the car. It's on the north side of a local lake. I've spent the past day looking through pictures of Sprites and other Austin Healeys on the internet. I don't know what year this car is yet, so I'm not sure what to expect.

I arrive at the location near dusk, despite my attempts to leave early. The owner is walking his dog by the lake and comes up to greet me. The car is horrid. It is a pale red almost pink color, with some yellow peeking through where the red paint has cracked. The front driver's side fender is rusted through and missing about 2 inches off the bottom behind the wheel. The windshield is cracked. The car is filthy from mud splashes of the dirt road it sits on. The interior has been stripped, but not completely, some carpet rubber still clings to some areas. The passenger seat is not even attached. The shifter is in place, but not fastened down. I have my work cut out for me. But, on the whole, it is still in ok shape. Mostly, it appears to be cosmetic damage.

March 16, 1997 -- My first day trying to pick up the beast. I have tried unsuccessfully to acquire a car trailer or tow dolly. We settle for the more difficult process of a tow cable. My friend Dave meets me at my house, and we take his truck to the site, stopping once for some fix-a-flat, just in case.

It is chilly out today and slightly overcast. I planned well and am wearing shorts. We get to the car and take a look at our prospects. Sure enough, the brakes are not functioning. The steering works fine. We push the car out of the ruts it's sunk into. And, turn it about to get it going the right way to tow off. The handbrake seems to be functioning so we decide we can go ahead and give it a shot. I put the top down...so I can leap to safety if something goes wrong. <wink> And I discover that the nice white vinyl top, which looked to be in great condition, is not. It begins to crumble upon movement. We fold it down as best we can, and I start adding up prices in my head. Brakes and top, good start.

It starts to rain now. This should have been taken as an omen. We hurry to attach the tow line. Everything is set and tight. I hop into the vehicle with one last, "Do you think we should?" to Dave. Dave claims it's now or never, I'm excited to get it home, we get started.

It is nearly 25 miles from the car to my house. It is Raining. It is Cold. I am wearing shorts, sitting in a convertible, with no brakes, about to be towed up a steep hill by my friend. Maybe at this point common sense should have stopped me, but I have my Grandfather's stubborn streak...the car was going home. The truck started and up the hill we went.

The hill was fine, it was the flat drive once we got to the top that caused the trouble. Once we were flat, I find that my car wanted to roll faster than Dave's truck wanted to drive. Then I had occasion to experience Terror as I discovered the Handbrake, which had stopped the car from a slow roll before, did nothing to bleed any speed anymore. I pulled to the side and motioned for Dave to slow down. The Nylon Tow cable slowed the car and kept me from running into Dave. I could tell Dave was having a good chuckle at my frantic waving. It was also fortuitous that no oncoming traffic was in the way for me to pull out beside Dave. Dave brought us to a stop, turning onto a side street that went slightly uphill to help. This was not going to work. We hadn't gone more than a mile. We decided to take it back and wait for the Dolly to be available. We had one obstacle, the steep hill.

We agreed that Dave would slow down very gradually and let the Sprite run into the back then we would ease it down the hill and back to it's resting area. Everything seemed to be going fine. We were just about to the bottom of the hill, which turned to the right. There was a sudden loud pop, then the sound of glass falling on metal. We had shattered the passenger side headlight. Argh! The bad idea had just started giving me a price tag.

We managed to get the car the rest of the way with no more damage. Total damage done today...One Headlight and headlight retaining ring. Thankfully, they were standard 7" lights, not Lucas Tripod and bulb arrangements or other fancies. They had been burnt out anyhow.

Moral of the story...Right Tools for The Job. If you need a tow dolly, use a tow dolly. Or Trailer if you can.

We never did need the Fix-a-flat.

March 17, 1997 - U-Haul has both Tow Trailer and Dolly in stock. Today only. I get permission to take a long lunch. Borrow my friend Matt's old full size pickup, which is a workhorse despite tons of problems and leaks it has. I traveled to U-Haul and picked up the full sized Trailer. For the $10 difference in price I decided the trailer would be better. I drove to the car.

Now my old military training started to kick in. I had a problem to solve. How was I to get the car on the trailer with just myself and no winch? My first attempts proved fruitless. I could not push the car with enough force, myself, while steering, to get it up the trailer ramps. Then I found a solution, not a good solution, but one that just might work. Right next to where the car was parked the hill continued down to the lake. A very steep one lane drive headed down to the lake. I felt that I could get the truck parked on the hill, with the trailer slightly down the hill, so that I could roll the car onto the trailer with just a little inertia helping.

Not being totally daft, I grabbed a few logs to use as blocks. And, set the chains of the trailer so the car would not get out of control and roll right over it into the back of the truck. I lined the car up and began the descent. Front wheels lined up and went up the trailer. The backs however, were off. I missed the ramp with the right side. I couldn't gain any purchase on the gravel to pull the car off. At this point it was starting to dawn on me that perhaps I was not the bright guy I thought I was. I had no choice. I blocked the car tires, and hopped in the truck. If the car wouldn't come off the trailer the trailer would have to come out from the car. I pulled down the hill about 8 feet. The car rolled gracefully off the trailer. I thought for a while on my course of actions. I decided I was not angled too far down the hill that it was unsafe to continue, yet.

I lined the car up again. This time I went slower. Taking a lot of time to check that the tires were lined up. The big problem I was encountering was that the U-haul trailer has an open center with rails all the way down the sides for the tires of the car. These rails were almost too far apart for a small car like the sprite. The front tires hung out into the open area by about a third of their width. However, the main part of the trailer does have angled extensions that come off the rails about 4 inches to hold whatever vehicle is on the trailer centered. If I could keep careful control of the car until it got to the main part of the trailer I was going to be fine. I got the front tires to the trailer top, but not to the safety zone yet. I had to make sure the rear tires lined up before giving it the final freedom to roll up the trailer. I had them lined up...I rolled forward, and to my shock and horror, the front left tire fell off the ramp. The car crashed down on the trailer. Somehow, though, the only damage was a slight bend in the front fender, the brunt of the car's weight was on a main support of the frame.

Now I had the car (half on, half off the trailer...the front left tire in the trailer), the truck parked (heading down a one lane road that ended in a pile of debris and a lake), and I was till in my shirt and tie from work. I ditched the shirt and tie in the truck. I cursed up a storm there for a while. Finally, after looking over the situation, realizing I was the only person anywhere around, and that if anything would be fixed, (and I was going to get back to work from my long lunch), I had better get to work. I found a small hydraulic tire jack behind the seat of my friend's truck. I blocked the rear tires of the car. Then, I stuffed a few more logs in front of them to be sure. I grabbed a landscaping log and the jack, and I stepped into the center of the trailer and crawled under the front of the car, whispering a silent prayer as I did so. I found a solid part of the undercarriage and I cleared the ground of gravel. I put the jack on the landscaping log to give me more height. I started to jack the front of the car up.

About one inch into the process, all hell broke loose. The truck began to slide down the hill on the gravel. The trailer and car had no choice but to go along. I, also, did not have that choice, it was being made for me. I was certain I was about to be crushed, (by my stupidity). I was doing the fastest crab walk I have ever done in my life to save my sorry hide. Lucky for me the total slide was about a foot and a half before the truck found purchase. I had done myself a service, the reason the truck stopped was that it ran into a Railroad tie. The one lane road to the lake was lined on either side by them. I had had the foresight to turn the truck tires to the closer side before getting to work.

I was getting seriously worried I was not going to pull this off. Pride was now getting in the way of completing this job, I wanted to do this myself, no help from friends...I crawled back under and began the jacking the car up again. This time it jacked up OK. I got the car high enough that the tire would clear the trailer if I pulled forward. The other tire would have to roll down the ramp though. I got in the truck, straightened the tires. Looked back to see how everything looked...blocks under tires, car high enough to clear the trailer, everything as good as it would get. I gunned it.

The trailer pulled out, the wheel rolled down, and the car fell off the jack...but it didn't roll and the springs were good on it. I was free of that.

I looked at my situation. In my opinion, I was now angled too far down the hill to make a safe run on the trailer. However, I had no where below that I could turn the truck around with the trailer...nor could I squeeze past the Sprite on the hill. I considered pulling ahead, moving a Railroad tie and moving the sprite into the side and then leaving. How could this car be worth all this? I decided to move the car over, drive down, unhitch the trailer, turn around then pull the trailer to the top and the car to the top with chains. I set my blocks and turned the tires of the car. I placed a block in position less than a foot past the existing block...I was going to ease the car down. I pushed the car back, and pulled the block in use. The car rolled forward, to the next block...then over it...then on down the hill with me pushing and pulling as hard as I could.

Once again I lucked out, as the car met the trailer to one side. The center of the car slid up the trailer ramp and it stopped. It is a testament to these cars that I had not done any serious damage to it yet. The car was over to the side as I wanted. So I blocked the tires...all of them...real good...and drove the trailer out from the car yet again. This time I kept going.

It turns out that the base of the hill was much wider than I expected so I was able to stutter turn the truck and trailer around and head up the hill.

I got to the car, and realized that my chains were still in Dave's truck, not Matt's. I resolved myself to pushing the car uphill. I butted the truck to the front of the car...The truck bumper against my headlight(s). I moved the blocks and got back in the truck. The truck had some trouble pushing the car and pulling the full sized trailer up the gravel. It had balding tires and just couldn't get good purchase. But, after some work I managed to do it. I had one mishap. At one point I had to stop to straighten the wheels of the car. As I switched from Drive to Park in the car, I passed Reverse and pulled back about a foot from the car...It obligingly followed me back down the hill...shattering the other headlight and bending the other fender in the process. Once to the top, I pushed the car to it's resting spot and drove off with the trailer to U-haul.

At U-Haul I explained that their trailer was too wide for the car. They traded me for the tow dolly which they assured me was narrower...I figured even if it wasn't, It only needed 2 wheels on it, not 4. I drove back to the car.

After a few unsuccessful attempts to roll the car onto the dolly, I tried my previous idea of a downhill run, only with a slight change. I pushed the car a little bit up the nearby hill, so as it rolled down it came onto level ground...then left the trailer level. And, WALLA, I got the car on the dolly. I cinched everything down and headed for the hills, my new car in tow.

I had a slightly harrowing incident on the road as a landscaping truck turned suddenly in front of me...he had no taillights. I squealed the tires, balding tires, of the truck, to a stop to avoid hitting him. No change to the car in tow. Once home I parked the car in front of the house and blocked the tires. And headed back to work...my 2 hour lunch having become 5 hours.

Moral of this story...See the moral from yesterday, and memorize it.

March 22, 1997 - My first day of work on the car. I awoke at 11 AM on Saturday and went straight to work...after a quick stop for a glass of milk. I looked at the car. And I took a number of before pictures at this point. Outside, interior, engine, everything I thought was good. Last night I had given the car a good sponge bath and gotten most of the dirt off her. I went in the house to get my tools and discovered the back door open to the garage and the garage door wide open. My roommates were still asleep. I did a quick inventory and thankfully nothing was missing. Later I "had a Talking to" with my roommates. Something like "Dude, you left the door open all night." "Oh, yeah, sorry." Great, that taken care of, I grabbed my tools and set to work.

My First priority was to get some form of braking working. I decided the Handbrake would be a good project to start with, as I was low on cash to buy many parts at this point. I jacked the left rear of the car up, with blocks in place and a towline attached to my car parked in front of it. I removed the wheel caps from all the wheels...I plan to purchase sport wheels so If there is someone looking for original AH wheel caps email me. They have some red paint on them but mostly good, not many dents or scratches. I removed the wheel and just attempted to use the brake adjustment bolt to see if I could get any grab. Nada. I also discovered that the connecting rods from the Handbrake line had been replaced with a bent piece of metal rod. Not real tight either, there was a lot of play in the pushrods. I decided to go ahead and pull the drum, it would need doing later anyhow, might as well see what it looked like. It was in surprisingly good shape, but as I had guess the rubber covers on the brake unit were rotted, and it had frozen. I pulled the pads and shoes out. And played about with the adjuster. After I had it working properly, I replaced the shoes and pads as is...I will need to replace them and have them adjusted properly later, but my concern was just something to stop the car at this point. I broke the end off the left pushrod for the handbrake while trying to free it from the lever for the brake itself. This worked out well as the new length once I had rebent it took all the slack out of the line. I verified that the handbrake now was moving the shoes in the brake and replaced the drum onto the brake. Using the brake adjuster bolt I was now able to get grab. It took me a while to get it to what I felt was a proper brake level. I adjusted it so the wheel would spin with a slight scraping sound with the handbrake off. And stop with the brake about halfway back. I felt this would be the best for now. I replaced the wheel and tire and lowered the car. I pulled the handbrake, and removed the blocks and towline. The car stayed put. Woo Hoo. My first repair was a success. I replace blocks, et al., and did the right side. Following the same procedure.

I then started to remove the bumpers, as I wanted to prevent damage to the chrome while I was working. However. The bolts were too tight and rusted, and my WD40 was running low. I sprayed them a bit, and let it work. I figured I had accomplish my goal for this weekend. Best to stop before I broke anything. > Moral for today...With any new project, take your time, set your goals where you can accomplish them. Persistence can overcome a lot of things, but It won't save you when the trash truck cuts you off on the highway. It is very important not to settle for second best on certain parts of your car...one of these is the brakes. What I accomplished today was nothing more than the ability to park on a hill. I would not trust the brakes on the car to stop me on a towline, but I do trust the job I've done to keep the car from rolling down the road into the neighbor's house. I would not have been able to accomplish this if not for a service manual for this vehicle. I have a Haynes manual, however, there are others. Most important...If you don't know, ask or find someone who does.

March 23, 1997 - My roommates helped me move the car to the back of the house and up the driveway. I discovered a wasp's nest in the trunk, will need to RAID that. Moral for today...insects love cars, to the point they are willing to die for them.

J